Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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This couple is having the most passionate sex ever one night, and the guy cums before he gets a chance to pull out. He gets the woman pregnant. Now they are married.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops