Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +9

the NAACP

thumb_up thumb_down +9

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

thumb_up thumb_down +9

hi michael

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Who wants water? I do.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My therapist says that I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops