a blind man walks into a wall

i committed murder

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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