A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops