why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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penis

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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KILL WHITEY

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What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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