A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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Why was 9/11 funny? It wasnt; amny people died.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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* anti-punchline

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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