Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

Wenis Penis

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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