Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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did you hear about the fly on the toilet? i heard he got pissed off!

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A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

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What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

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whats the best joke ever? womens rights

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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what do you call a professional gamer Their name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops