Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

Obama holds the most records for Multikills with Drones. Mu-mu-muuuultiiikilllll.

One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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