Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

National security?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops