Gay marriage is freaking gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn! What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck! What starts with S and ends with EX? Spandex!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So there's this girl who really wanted red socks. She goes to the store, socks are $2. Well, that sucks, she thinks. I only have $1. So she goes home and asks her mom for a buck. Sure, the mom replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my vacuum cleaner. So the girl fixes the vacuum cleaner, mom giver her the buck. The girl goes to the store, but wait. Socks are $3 now. Girl goes home, asks her dad for a buck. Sure, the dad replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my car. Girl fixes car, dad gives het a buck. Girls goes to store.Well damn, the socks are $4 now. She goes home and asks her brother for a buck. Sure, her brother replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my computer. Girl fixes computer, brother giver her a buck. Girl goes to store and FINALLY buys the socks. She comes home. Mother dead. Vacuum cleaner exploded. For 1 month the girl mourns her mom. Finally she can wear her socks. Ah crap, car accident. After 1 month mourning her dad she can finally wear the socks. Well, turns out she can't. Brother dead cause of exploded computer. After yet another month of mourning, she can FINALLY wear her red socks. So she does. Suddenly the doorbell rings. The girl opens the door and there's a polar bear standing in front of her. What did the polar bear say? WELL NOTHING, BECAUSE POLAR BEARS CANNOT TALK!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops