Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

I'm rick james bitch

Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

Why did the chicken cross the road? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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