How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? About 144 licks but everyone gets different answers because we all lick lollipops differently.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

one day ill be as old as you but you'll be older then too.

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

The Ohio State Buckeyes

What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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