What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

If you have a stroke, call 000

Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

What is the quickest way to speed up your 70 year old husband’s heart rate? Extract of foxglove is a very effective blocker of the parasympathetic nervous system, and since the parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for slowing the heart, this would lead to an increase in heart rate. However, it is very dangerous to use such chemicals without advice, and therefore it is better to seek an examination and, if necessary, a prescription from a qualified GP.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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