Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Cheese and toast

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops