Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

Here's a joke The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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