What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

Women's Rights

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

I'm Polish.

Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

why did road cross the chicken Niggers love chicken.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

What's 1+1? 69.

Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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