Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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