What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

thumb_up thumb_down +43

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

thumb_up thumb_down +37

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops