why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops