What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

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Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops