Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

i dont fisish anythi

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Poop

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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