Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

Face...tastes like chicken!

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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