What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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