Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

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Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

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A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

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How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

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Why did the blond fail her math test? Because she got all the questions wrong.

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Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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A black man, a Pakistani and Jew sit at a bar. It's great to see such a cosmopolitan community.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

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Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

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a dumb blond walks into a hair salon and gets her hair died brown... she is now a dumb brunette

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Feeling alone fast after opening your mouth? Feel that people ignore your conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say AHAH!... And Uhuh, and I PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND! Now YOU CAN BE APPRECIATED INSTANTLY BY A BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE SAYING!

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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