Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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