Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

thumb_up thumb_down -8

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

thumb_up thumb_down -8

hi hey i hate you why you ate my mother she tasted good i like fried chicken ITS A SMALL WORLD! SO DO I well lets go to the beach ok

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops