Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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whats funnier than womens rights? ottos weight

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

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Charlie Sheen

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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