What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

ok everybody to make this more simple we all have to line up alphabetically by height.

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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