A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

what did the man say to the other man? hey

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Justin's life

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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