Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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