What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

knock knock go away

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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