What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

thumb_up thumb_down +6

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

White men's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops