Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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