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ejaculation JLR

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Breaking news! An 18 wheeler has gone loose and hit a playground damaging a swing, 1 fatality and 16 children injured 5 in critical condition

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A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

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What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

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What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

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A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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