Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

69

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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