what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

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I'm Coming

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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