Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

Are you gay. No. Ok.

How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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