A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What peels, is a fruit, yellow and tastes like a bannana? A bannana.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?????

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops