Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

what is big round and fat? Your MOM

Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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