Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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