What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

Indians

How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

Did you hear about the blond that jumped off a bridge? She died.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

eoin burgin is fat

What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

A hispanic priest with a huge boner walks into a bar.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

Q: Why was it bad to be a black jew during the Holocaust? A: You had to sit at the back of the gas chamber

why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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