Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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