What would u like to drink?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blind, black guy walks into a building. Unfortunately it was a secret KKK building and they beat him, raped him and left him to die. Luckily he was found alive and transported to the hospital. To bad the hospital was bombed by Al Queda.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are pink your nanas in the cowfeild with a bottle of stink... not really shes long gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the jerk say to the Mexican? You are a Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A guy walks into a grocery store. He asks a lady where the potatoes are. She says on isle 5 He goes to isle 5, but there are no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"...."-Hellen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops