Abbie has head so far up her arse, it just LOOKS like it's coming out her neck.

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

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Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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whats 7+4? 74

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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