What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

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Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

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What's your guys names?

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

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How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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