there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

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War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Here's a joke for you, my life...

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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Darnell has a 2 ounce gold chain around his neck. Gold is worth $1,639 per ounce. Where did Darnell steal the gold chain from?

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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Two men walk into a bedroom. Did I mention they were gay?

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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