have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

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A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

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whats the differnce between a white boy and a black boy? skin color

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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