Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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the NAACP

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A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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