a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

i hate non minorities!

Why did the toddler fall in the pool? He was irresponsibly left unattended outside and tripped on the edge of the pool. He died within two minutes and his parents were blamed for his death.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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