What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Hey Shea

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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kkkk

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops